September 2018

New month, new phase of live, new experiences together and a new outlook on the future.

September was off to an interesting start with no custody agreement the Big Boys operated on “borrowed time” which, as you can imagine, was way less than ideal. When we would part ways at the end of our time together both of us were left with a lot of questions mainly when will we be able to see each other again? Can you believe how har that is; dropping off you son and not knowing when you will be able to see him again. It’s a pain I wouldn’t wish on anyone and there was nothing I could do; I had to go to work to pay all these bills, I had to facilitate time between his mother and him, its just a heard spot to be in. Thankfully mid-month we were able to come to a custody agreement that suits the current situation, her not working and Evan not in school. I will say that not knowing when you get to see your kid again is horrible and hear breaking. It certainly forces you to cherish all the small and I mean tiny aspects and details of life and your time together. There would be times I would just watch him sleep and once I calmed my mind from thinking about all the uncertainties I really focused on all his little features. The hundreds of freckles on his nose and cheeks, how long his eyelashes really are the shape of his little nose ears and hands and just how big he has gotten in the month I wasn’t able to see him.

We crammed and I me crammed activities in the months his first baseball game, the newsuem, splash pad, park trips, playing in the streams on the trails by our house, baking, pumpkin carving, cox farms, and plain old heart-warming time together and with friends. This kiddo loves his buddy Bennett and would always ask to go see him when we were together; Evan is shy so any time with a friend he opens up to and goes bananas running wild with him is a great time. At Cox farms Evan must have done the Dinosaur sack slide 10 time easily; he loved it and it was a nice change for it to be just us so I could take him over and over and over with no one else’s timeline and wants to have to consider.

When Evan was gone and it was Hercules and I we spent a lot of time taking walks throwing the ball and reconstituting Evan’s toy stash and clothes; not much was left at all so we started from scratch and I began following the “mommy” pages on facebook to get an idea of the deals out there and the fun weekend adventures; I even got a target card lol.

After not being able to see him in August, Sept 2018 really signified a turning point in both our lives. More than a new chapter an entirely new book. One with a lot of blank pages that we will be so fortunate to write together as we see fit on our own timeline and together as the Big Boys.

I am happy this month is over-I’m ready for October; fall and the future.